Bane of Arranged Marriage.

Saw this post in ChennaiOnline. It talks of about a woman conspiring with her lover to kill her newly wed husband during her honey-moon. She did indeed succeed in murdering him, but goes on to confessing about her plot to the police. Now thats what they call as " Love is Blind "....


That brings us to the interesting topic of the bane of arranged marriage.

Dissecting this case, it turns out that this marriage between the girl and her husband was an arranged marriage. Maybe, the girl's parents opined that once her marriage was over, their daughter would forget her lover. Now, was that a neat cover-up by the girl's parents or a lapse of judgement on the part of the boy's parents. Whose is at fault ?

Should have the boy done some investigation into the girl's antecendant to verify her past. Normally, its the other way, where the girl's parents conduct a due-dilligence excercise by verifying the boy's history through various sources. Its akin to the extensive investigation that would ensue before the merging of two companies. No wonder, since its a matter of a partner for life and people dont want to take chances or suffer heart-burns later on....


If its an economic consideration, a love marriage wins hands down since, its normally a low-profile secretive event. I still do not understand the fanfare which accompanies a typical arranged marriage(A.marriage). My small brain is unable to fathom the pride and gala time that characterise any A.marriage. What defeats logic is that in the name of celebration, people have fun and frolic. What's the cause for all this excitement. Is something path-breaking or earth-shattering happening. Why does'nt any wise man speak on this topic. Some parents go all the way out to spend their live's savings for their kids wedding. Another allied prevalent custom still present in some areas with respect to arranged marriages is the concept of Dowry where the girl's parents have to give cart-loads of money supposedly for the maintenance of their girl. If so much money is available, why on earth send her to another house. She can continue as usual at her parents place.. What significant difference does a husband bring into such a girl's life ?

I think I would reserve this discussion for another post...

coming back to the original discussion, it would be interesting to know the mindset of parents who contemplate arranging life-partners for their kids. How do they know what is suitable for their kids ? Is it that they get a gut feeling on seeing the prospective partner as the right match for their ward.How much time do they give to arrive at this conclusion. Are the parents competent for doing this. ? The irony is that most parents impose the unfulfilled agenda's of their own personal lives on their children. If they had dreamed to become a doctor and could not become one, they drive their kids to become one (This is still prevalent atleast in India. Becoming a doctor is genetically imbibed in their children's genes !!!).
Yes, everything is done with the good intention that their kids should outbeat them in every conceivable sphere of life. Similarly, this agenda also gets imposed when it comes to choosing life-partners.What if some decision's of their's backfires.. Nobody documents them for posterity since the intention behind all these acts are kind of Noble and hence gets rationalized and brushed under the carpet..